Twitter Sitter #FF @DILLONFRANCIS @majorlazer @lenadunham @SarahPaIinUSA etc.

The Twitterverse exploded this weekend beginning last Friday and Saturday morning with the whole announcement of Paul Ryan — luckily, we found better things from Major Lazer, Lena Dunham, and our favorite parody accounts.

Trust me, if there really WAS a pussy riot in Russia, I would have known about it.

— Sarah PaIin (@SarahPaIinUSA) August 9, 2012

In case you missed it, punk rock is in in a bad way in Russia. 

Remember in Part of Me when Katy P is bravely getting in the zone as she rises to stage? I think about that every morning in the elevator <3

— Lena Dunham (@lenadunham) August 14, 2012

I just farted in the club fuck y’all

— Dillon Francis (@DILLONFRANCIS) August 15, 2012

EXCLUSIVE MAJOR LAZER CARNIVAL MIX by @walshyfire LISTEN & DOWNLOAD HERE: bit.ly/MLCarnival

— Major Lazer (@majorlazer) August 15, 2012

It won’t matter if you dance to this in the club. 

Ryan/Romney in Mannequin III!

— LOLGOP (@LOLGOP) August 11, 2012

I’m slightly disappointed it’s not the “The Rent’s Too Damn High” guy.

— Ann Coulter (@AnnCoulter) August 11, 2012

Yes it’s true, Michael Jordan and I are having a fundraiser where you can hoop with both of us. Don’t all faint at once Black guys.

— Barack Obama (@ThePresObama) August 8, 2012

The #ClosingCermoney should end with a giant cage around the stadium & the athletes being informed they’ve been chosen for The Hunger Games.

— The Dark Lord (@Lord_Voldemort7) August 12, 2012

Is heaven missing an angel? Because it looks like your face got burned off or some shit entering Earth’s atmosphere.

— rob delaney (@robdelaney) August 15, 2012

@funkmasterflex tell that nigga Jim to defend himself … You stay out of it and have yourself a glass of fat free water.

— ♥ YUNG RAPUNXEL ♥ (@AZEALIABANKS) August 15, 2012

Remember when you used to call in to radio DJs?

One doesn’t care if Monday’s blue, Tuesday’s grey and Wednesday too, oh Thursday one doesn’t care about you, it’s Friday, one’s in love.

— Elizabeth Windsor (@Queen_UK) August 17, 2012

God Save The Queen — and all you queens this weekend.