Remember how Burger King was trying to be all haughty-healthy with new David Beckham-approved menu items like strawberry-banana smoothies? Well, apparently the King had a bad breakup, got stoned to forget, and then invented the Bacon Sundae before spiraling completely out of control.
Meanwhile, Lays has risen above its polarizing Ketchup flavor to debut its latest flavor mash-up of Classic BLT, which we bet tastes nothing like the promised lettuce component.
Take a long, hard look at yourself, America. Proud?